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You so totally made my day, Ila. Thank you for reading all of my books. I really appreciate hearing that you liked them.

My fourth novel comes out April 2004. I just approved the cover art. My editor says its her favorite of all my stories. So I'm excited!

Again, thanks for reading, especially while you have two kids running around.

All best,

Jessica Inclán

I picked up your third book while browsing at the new fiction table. The story appealed to me because I am also the mother of a 6-year old girl who has autism. The theme of getting in the car and "driving away" sparked my interest. I enjoyed your book and I think it touched on many of the issues of raising a child with a disability in today's world.

I did read the interview at the end of the book and in the author's response was somewhat surprised when you stated that you looked up to mother's who are raising a child with a disability but could never do it yourself. I felt the same way prior to having children, however my daughter was not diagnosed until the age of 2 and even though I would not have chosen to be a mother of a child with a disability and have felt that I could not have done it myself. I have no choice, and I just do it. What other choice is there than to love and be there for your child.

Thanks again for telling an important story.

Ann Brown

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Thanks so much for your letter, Ann. I appreciate it. I’m really glad that you though thought it brought forth important issues.

I do truly admire mothers and fathers who raise children with disabilities. I think I also said that I would not choose to have a child with a disability, but, as you state, sometimes there is no choice. We don't get to pick. My oldest son developed a drug addiction when he was 14--I would never choose to go into an out-patient therapy with a child, but, well, what else could I do? But looking from the outside in, I see how much work it can be. All I have for parents who work hard with their children (regardless of what the "problem" is) is admiration.

Thanks again for reading, Ann.

Jessica

I've just finished "When You Go Away". I had great sympathy for Peri and Brooke especially. I know how Peri felt, how she needed to escape, to get away before she exploded. My husband and I adopted a 2 year old girl 17 years ago. We didn't know at the time that she would be diagnosed with a combination of serious mental illnesses. Over the 13 years that she lived with us we had her to 14 different psychiatrists/psychologists. They diagnosed everything from nothing, to defiant disorders, to personality disorders and everything else. Many, many times I felt like Peri, that I wanted to escape, to run away, to hide, to have someone help me. I had my two biological son's to protect as well. Our daughter abused our first son, physically, mentally and sexually. She killed our family pets. She had screaming fits where she would bang her head off walls. In August of 1999 she attempted suicide. She was held against her will under a S! action of the Mental Health Act. The second day in hospital, she tried to hang herself in the bathroom. She was 15 years old at this time. She was sent to yet another treatment facility. This time in Toronto. For 3 months, my husband and I traveled to Toronto every other day to visit her. She came home the last day of October 99. Between Oct. 99 and Jan. 2000 when she was arrested, she set our kitchen on fire, one bathroom on fire, her hair on fire, began carving her stomach, wrist and chest daily with butcher knives. She began stalking us in our own home, coming into rooms at night and turning the lights off so we didn't know where she was in the room, thereby forcing my husband and I to sleep in shifts. That way one of us was up 24 hours a day to watch where and what she was doing. Eventually, we had an alarm system wired into the door frame of her bedroom so we knew when she entered and exited her room. All of the so-called "support agencies" wouldn't help us.!

We called the Children's Aid Society for help, our family doctor's called, the psychiatrists called. They said "NO, she is NOT a child in need of protection and she is NOT a child welfare issue". They wanted to take our two boys into foster care to protect them from her and leave our daughter with us with no help. On January 23/2000, she was arrested for attempted murder on the son she had abused for 9 years. The judge reduced her charges from attempted murder to "threatening death, assault causing bodily harm to a minor and uttering death threats" due to her long mental history. She was sentenced by the Court to a residential treatment facility in Ottawa, Ontario, 4 hours from our home. She has remained there until this past July when the Courts instructed the Children's Aid Society of Ottawa to take her as a client in-care as the psychiatrists involved strongly advised against her EVER returning to the family home as she was "capable of causing death to her young brother Michael". She is currently living in a group home there. During her stay in Ottawa, she has tried to sue us for her mental disabilities etc. How my husband and I managed to raise two perfectly sane and normal boys and hold our marriage together for 24 years is beyond me. You do what you have to do. Our boys are now 10 and 12 years of age. We live in fear as she continues to mention that someday she'd like to "rape, molest, torture and murder Michael" and "kill" my husband and I by "burning the house down". So, Ms. Inclan, I can completely sympathize with Peri. Although our daughter didn't have a physical disability, her mental disability forced me to be as attentive, as watchful and on as guard as I could possible be, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. I can't even begin to articulate the emotions we've been through. Some I think, I didn't even know existed. There was anger, compassion, love, hate, longing, betrayal, distrust, fear, sadness, grief, hurt, shame, guilt, envy and a whole raft of other emotions. Our daughter has been diagnosed as: "anti-social personality disorder, attachment disorder, conduct disorder, sexual sadism and major depressive disorder with psychotic features" and she is only 18! She'll turn 19 this November. How sad for her to live her life without a conscience or remorse. To never feel "bonded" or "attached" to anyone or anything. Although I've given you a very short, narrative of our daughter and our life with her, I hope you can see how I can understand and really feel the feelings of the characters in your book.

I can understand Carly and Ryan's fears as well. Being afraid for their sister Brooke and their Mom. Unknown and unexplored feelings about their father who left them, now their Mom was gone. Peri's feelings about her unsupportive father I felt akin to as well. My father is NOT the most supportive person in the world either and he caused me as much grief as our daughter did during that time. 

When You Go Away was a "real" story. A real story in the sense, that yes, these situations do occur, there are real live people dealing with these situations each and everyday and that there isn't always a silver lining or a light at the end of the tunnel. Peri must live without her children now for a year, perhaps longer. She must attend her classes and prove not only to the courts, the doctors and her children that she is a capable and fit Mom, but also to herself!!

Thank you Mrs.. Inclan for another touching, real story. I am so looking forward to your 4th novel.

If you EVER need anyone to promote your books in Canada, I'm available and volunteering for the job. I talk to everyone and anyone I know now about your books.

Thanks again and keep well!

Sincerely,

Louise

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My goodness, Louise. What a terrible, terrible story. It's completely and utterly amazing that your two boys are all right and that you and your husband are still married. That does indeed say something amazing about your family. I truly hope your daughter can somehow heal herself and I also hope that she leaves you all alone so that you can heal as well. Thanks for sharing your journey with me.

Any amount of your support it appreciated! Just sharing my books with friends or asking for them in bookstores is great. Writing reviews to post on Amazon.com or barnesandnoble.com would be great, too.

Again, thanks for all your nice words in this and past emails, and again, thank you for sharing your story. It's really a testament to you and your husband that you're all still standing.

Best,

Jessica